About Us
Next Service
Cultivate Growth and Learning
Sunday, September 8, 2024 10:00 a.m.
Service Leaders:
Paula Gribble, Director of Lifespan Religious Education
Rev. Amanda Weatherspoon, Minister, Lay Service Leader
John Herrick, Director of Music
Community Compass
Life RE-Examined: On Cultivation
This year, we are exploring Monthly Ministry Themes*. The themes will carry through Worship, Lifespan Religious Education, Community Sundays and other programming at UUCC. We hope this exploration of thematic ministry will offer greater connection and deeper meaning.
September’s Ministry Theme is Cultivation. What are we cultivating? Where in our lives could/do we cultivate something? How does it play out in the wider community? And why does it matter to UUs?
When people think of cultivation, they often go straight to planting and tending gardens. And this is a great place to start, especially since it is a wonderful metaphor for other types of cultivation in our lives. When we physically cultivate – as in gardening – we do more than just plant or grow something. More than just putting the plant or flower or vegetable into the ground, when we cultivate, we tend it and care for it and nurture it. From prepping the soil to considering sunlight and water needs to removing weeds and aerating the soil, cultivation is a deeper level of growing.
And so it is with our lives. We can meet people in all kinds of places, and we may even return and see them again. But when we cultivate relationships, we must tend them and nurture them. Cultivating a relationship offers deeper, richer connection…and the growth that comes from this kind of cultivation is exponential.
Another way we cultivate is with ideas. We can cultivate creativity, cultivate knowledge and learning, cultivate thought. And we can do this alone, or in community. In fact, doing this in community is core to Unitarian Universalism. Living our UU values means we continue to grow, continue to build relationships, continue to work for a better world. We cultivate.
Because cultivation isn’t just about the act of doing something new or exploring something further. It’s also about how it brings improvement or betters a situation. When we tend to our lives and our world in a cultivation mindset, we experience growth ourselves and encourage growth in others. And the hope is that we are all better for it.
During the Theme Discussion** on September 1, I challenged participants to ponder three ways of cultivation over the month of September, and I hope we can all do the same:
- Cultivation beyond yourself – out in the community or in the world and for its betterment
- Cultivation among others – in relationship, to create deeper and richer experiences together
- Cultivation within yourself – the growth and development of you, as you keep learning
I leave you with this…may you enjoy the new spaces, ideas, and relationships you can cultivate…and may it all be guided by LOVE.
In Faith,
Paula Gribble, DLRE
*October’s Ministry Theme will be Thresholds.
**Each month, on the first Sunday, we will hold a Theme Discussion at 11:30 in the Sanctuary.
Article II Passes at UUA General Assembly
After a 4+ year process of discernment, feedback, and conversation, the vote of the delegates to General Assembly on the proposed revisions to Article II of the UUA bylaws was 80.2% in favor, 19.8% against – the changes are passed – perhaps notably by a similar margin as our own congregational vote on Article II. Thanks to the delegates who represented UUCC at GA.
The process, both here at UUCC and in the wider UU community, has been complex and at times difficult. There have been conflicts and hurt feelings as well as excitement and inspiration.
Just before the final discussion of the proposed changes, Rev. Victoria Safford, a UU minister known for her way with words, offered a personal reflection.
Rev. Safford spoke of the importance of this moment, and also recalled the time decades ago, when the Principles and Purposes were new and themselves deeply controversial among us, with many concerned they signaled the end of our movement. “And yet,” she observed, “Here we are, not destroyed. We can neither be brought down nor saved by any bylaw change. It’s the way we move that matters, the way we move forward together, the weight of the trust and respect and compassion we bear for each other, the strength of our great covenant. However we vote, we put love at the center, unflinching, insistent.”
She closed her reflection with a reminder to breathe. “What matters to you in this vote?” she asked. “And what will happen to that thing if the vote does not go your way? What will truly be lost? And what won’t, if it’s true? What will abide either way, still holding you, still calling out your name? And if the vote goes the way you hope it will today, how tomorrow and in the days to come will you reach out to your people, your UU family – and I mean those who you don’t agree with, who may not be like-minded but surely are like-hearted. If the vote goes the way you want, how will you resolve to be an agent of healing, a brave, humble channel of healing and hope?”
“Friends,” she said, “however it goes, we must stay hand in hand, drawing our circle more wide.”
Now that the changes have passed, it is time first to pause, to rest and regroup. Then you will begin the process of deciding what the changes mean in the day-to-day life of this congregation. Especially once Rev. Amanda arrives, you will continue to discern your way forward together based on the mission, vision, and ends you created together.
For an overview of other governance voting results from General Assembly, click here.
Life RE-examined: On Pronouns and Binary Thinking
As we enter Pride month, I have our LGBTQ+ siblings on my mind and heart. How can we be allies to these folks? How can we challenge ourselves beyond our own conditioned binary thinking? How can straight and cisgender* people support the LGBTQ+ community in a real way? We must start by showing up in ways that may make us uncomfortable but may also create safe space for others to claim their full identities.
I believe for straight and cisgender people, the place to begin is Binary Thinking. In American culture, we have been trained and taught binary thinking. Also known as dichotomous thinking, binary thinking happens when complex concepts, ideas, and problems are overly simplified into an either/or perspective. We have been conditioned to believe that all, or at least most, things have 2 sides…and only two sides. Things are expected to be up or down, right or wrong, male or female.
For Unitarian Universalists, we have long fought binary thinking when it comes to civil rights, to pluralistic beliefs, to nuanced ideas of individual thinking. In UU circles, it is rare that people are expected to think or believe that things are strictly this or that. We welcome a diversity of education, intellectual prowess, intricacies of personality, multiple backgrounds, and more. And we often “study” to continue to open our minds.
Yet, somehow when it comes to sexuality and gender identity, we revert to antiquated ways of thinking. We feel confronted and frustrated and confused. What does this have to do with me, we might say. Why do I have to do things differently? This pronoun thing is someone else’s new idea, so why do I have to change?
Here’s why: We are UUs and we have committed ourselves to living our values, to transforming our hearts and minds, to finding new ways to widen the circle and invite others in…so they become not others, but us.
I am not saying it isn’t hard, or comfortable, or even that it will always make sense to straight and cisgender folks. What I am saying is that it’s not always bad to pushed a little to expand your thinking. And in this case in particular, you just have to remember that it’s not about you.
If you’re ready to have your binary mind made more open, here a few things to know and practice:
- Sexuality is about orientation, about who you’re attracted to and who you feel drawn to romantically, emotionally, and sexually. (Orientation is not gender)
- One’s sex is a biological descriptor of a person’s reproductive, hormonal, anatomical, and genetic characteristics. (Sex does not directly indicate orientation, and does not in and of itself define gender)
- Gender is someone’s internal perception of their identity, and how one feels they want to express that identity. It can refer to socially constructed roles, behaviors, expressions and identities. (Gender identity does not directly indicate sex, or sexual orientation.
- When a person expresses their sexuality or gender to a straight, cisgendered person, there is no requirement that we “understand” or agree with it. It isn’t ours to define.
- Gender-fluid refers to or relates to a person who does not identify as having a single unchanging gender.
- Transgender folks are those who do not identify with the gender they were assigned at birth. This may or MAY NOT include physical changes or hormone therapy.
Here are a few reminders when interacting:
- If you would not ask about a straight, cisgendered person that very personal question about their sexuality, don’t ask an LGBTQ+ person.
- If you don’t know someone’s pronouns, it is very appropriate to say, “I’m sorry. I don’t know your pronouns. Can you tell me?”
- Some people don’t think using “they” is grammatically correct, but THEY might not realize THEY have been using it as a singular pronoun all of THEIR life.
- We cannot assume someone’s sexuality or gender based on the way they physically present themselves.
- WE CAN model gender identity safety by giving our own pronouns when we introduce ourselves. This may feel awkward at times, but it creates a safe place for folks who need to share their identity.
- Because we can’t make assumptions, and because as UUs we want to be as kind and loving as possible, we must make a space for a person working through identity and expression. Part of this work may be stating pronouns.
- Our LGBTQ+ folks do not need to hear your disagreement or personal struggle with sexuality and gender. If you do not understand someone’s sexuality or gender, and/or you are in a group and don’t want to share your identity or pronouns, JUST DON’T. You don’t have to make an angry statement about it, and if you do all it does is make them feel unsupported.
The truth is, there’s a lot to unpack for straight and cisgendered folks. There’s a lot to learn about our changing world. And even when we try to do our best, we will ALL make mistakes. We will ALL make mistakes. It’s important for us to not let that fear of making mistakes stop us from living into our UU values and principles.
And it’s always important (no matter what the subject) to keep learning and growing as individuals.
In Faith,
Paula Gribble
NOTE: I previously offered a class on this topic and too few registered to make the class happen. If you are interested in learning more on the topic, I will offer the class again in Fall 2024.
*Cisgender is defined as “denoting or relating to a person whose gender identity corresponds with the sex registered for them at birth; not transgender.”
Board of Trustees Announces Results of Settled Minister Vote
On Sunday, May 5, 2024, the UUCC Board of Trustees conducted a Congregational Meeting during which members had the opportunity to vote on whether to call Reverend Amanda Weatherspoon as our full-time settled minister.
Your Board of Trustees is delighted to announce that the congregation voted overwhelmingly to call Reverend Amanda Weatherspoon as the new Settled Minister of the Unitarian Universalist Community of Charlotte.
The vote tally was 271 in favor and 1 opposed, a margin of 99.6%.
This meeting was the much-anticipated culmination of the year-long search to call a settled minister that was led by the Settled Minister Search Team, a group of UUCC members who dedicated innumerable hours to bring members a candidate for Settled Minister who has the personal qualities and professional experience required to fulfill members’ high expectations for our next minister. If you would like to read more about the Search Team and search process, click here.
Rev. Amanda will join us on August 1, 2024. You can learn more about her on our website (click here).
Thank you to everyone who participated in the Candidating Week events and who voted.